Logic looming letting go..

Okay so I wanted to act smart and play on the L word up there, go ahead fire me.. To be a lot more lucent this post is about letting go, its directed towards a certain somebody who knows who it/he/she is provided that who is reading it. I promise it wont be as convoluted as this beginning, talking about convoluted my newest word of day is circumvent, I have been actively using it in lots of conversations. More on that later, oh yes and my aura is yellow btw, but I guess that rounds up my personality info for the month.

So back to letting go, and if I have talked about this earlier then pardon me, or blame it on aging gray cells. The only thing I learned in swimming after a lot of paid lessons was to float. And the basic premise of floating mostly is to let go. There are tones of examples with quick sand and what not. Gist being there are many times in life when it is essential to let go. The more you struggle; you either end up in the deep end or getting yourself in more muck than you started with.

As creatures of habit, we have a tendency to cling on to the usual, to the everyday, to our routines, to things and very rarely to people. Talk about one clingy breed, but talking about clingy I m definitely writing once on trees but more on that later. Its mostly for the sense of security it provides. There cannot be bigger mirage than sense of security, it’s never there but we are always seeking it.

There are some basic principles in life, like live, eat, breathe, some personal principles, sleep 8 hrs, be helpful, try not to stab people, but besides all that everything is variable and it should be. The moment we try to create constants in our environment either there is chaos, or stagnant environs ruts. So spring cleaning is essential, make that all year round, tossing out all that was most essential before but just does not work now, is not giving up, it just means you are letting go so that you can float again…..

Affirmative Action

I am all about thoughts, feelings, metaphysical, paranormal, extra terrestrial, sarcasm laden posts. So here are my baby steps to some political rambling. I am msnbc reader who chances upon news channel mostly in gym, coz those are the only channels which seem like fun reading with the captions, plus that white hair guy looks good.

So I was reading about how Chinese have been classified as black. Yea that’s what caught my ADD attention also. So the funda is that in South Africa, amongst the group of people who suffered apartheid, they have included blacks, Indians and now Chinese also.
So Chinese people will be eligible for any benefits under affirmative action programs by the government. We all know how that works, you know being from India having that arjun singh guy brainstorming.

So basically to bring up oppressed members of society, or provide them equal opportunity, reservations, promotions and so on so forth are provided. Affirmative actions. My question is when India got independence, was not everybody oppressed for about a century. And at the current rate do the general junta become oppressed and will they be granted any reprieve in the coming years.

I mean it’s a never ending debate, and me being a coward I decided to walk away and hole in another country altogether. This is one of the prime reasons I avoid reading any news from India or any news period, I am happy in my soundproof well, so even if this titanic with it affirmative action upper deck goes down, at least I had a good ride. That’s it for my really terse political post, will be back with some new stuff very soon..

There is some vagueness in the air

I just realized I have never dedicated any blog to the essence of this blogspot. So here is an unabashed admiration towards the vagueness and randomness in life. Life is really vague, especially once on your own. Following directions and reaching a destination is a no-brainer. It’s choosing your own path, stumbling along the way and reaching somewhere which might or might not be it, can be serendipitous or an accident.

This is where the vagueness in life comes in picture. Only in animations or soaps or make believe world are things so clear. Like as soon as there will be a dead-end, there will be another way out. Somehow in the end everything works out. This is where real life is really vague, there are no absolute clues or paths or clarity of thought to find the same. It’s all a matter of trial and error and if lucky then some luck.

But that’s where this vagueness is beautiful, cause even with errors you can stumble into chambers which otherwise would never be known. Magnificent or not each path has its own merits. But this vagueness can be quite frustrating. I yearn for days when there will be flashing idea lights and pointers to the right way (I m thinking about buying TomTom for the pointer thingie, getting lost has lost its novelty), or maybe then again I m not looking at the right places.

I wanted this vague blog to be spectacular, magnificent, in depth, comprehensive, but then again it just turned out to be vague some things just need to grow into their character.

Memorable Loop

It has been quite some time into May, time for some thought provoking blogging. So the other day I read this article about a woman, actually there is a book out on it also, about how she has this perfect memory, she can remember every day since she was 8. Quite spectacular, but this memory is just limited to events that happened in her life, she was an above average student.

This whole memory thing brought back a couple of things. One of the things that she has mentioned was how this whole memory deal is huge downer when you remember each and every wrong anyone has ever done to you. The other thing she mentioned was how she constantly corrected her parents whenever they referenced to you had done this or that.

I had this talk once where I mentioned how I m such a cool, laidback person (I know modesty) in return I was asked if I ever forget stuff, which unfortunately I don’t coz my memory is picture perfect too, so then this friend said that you are not so cool and you don’t let things go.

Which brought up another question, does letting things go means forgetting whenever you think you have been wronged? I do understand the whole concept of forgiveness to move ahead in your life. But is forgiveness enough to get over things, especially when you can pull up wrongdoings in high definition without any effort?

Blessedly my memory is not that sharp, except for those exceptionally embarrassing moments which everyone treasures in their life. I m very content with my present state of forgetting names, occasions and above all any horror stories. Working very hard here to achieve my ultimate cool status. As for the memory woman, what would be awesome is if she could remember all these details in her next life, but that shall be another post…

Bad Karma et al

Not been blogging since some time due to some issues, which I m going to go in depth explore, dissect and discuss.. no that’s on my personal blog, this is still the impersonal one.

So anyways being the Aquarian I am, I have strong beliefs and disbeliefs in the extraordinary and generally beliefs go along with most of the weirdness out there. And then there was karma. Life always seems a little more fair when the concept of Karma is attached to all actions and deliberate inactions.

I am just going to go ahead and throw some stuff I have heard, admired, stuff that made some sense to me, so read on and don’t look for coherent thoughts (u shd know better by now). My mom always said, you create your own heaven and hell on earth. One of our pundits preached one day, we spend more time wishing bad for people rather than praying for some good for us. Its always I wish I get paid more than him/her rather than I get paid more period. Success is always measured in comparison; check out any Forbes list, or any list period.

There are tones of saying like what goes around comes around, u reap what u sow, everything happens for a reason and so on. I have seriously started questioning the logic behind these thoughts. Is it really true? Who is keeping score, besides the supposedly wronged party? Is it just some kind of quick fix to reassure us about the happy endings and general goodness in the grand scheme of things?

In the end I really don’t know if any of this bad karma, good karma means anything. Yes I do feel some high when I completely go out of the way to help someone and I do feel uncomfortable when I use that very apparent loophole. Besides that these thoughts do give a feeling of some overall justice, thereby reaffirming faith in another one of those phrases in the end everything comes together. Until then all we can do is invest some faith in our good karma and hope that everything does come together in the end..

Cable TV’s another world, rescue me..

I m still quite confused and don’t really know if I want to blog, and I hate admitting but work has the upper hand nowadays. So I watched californication yesterday, the show is more on the obvious word in there, mixed with drugs, writers block, hell-A theme. I have been watching basic channels forever and cable feels like the parental lock is finally gone. It’s a whole new world, not one I particularly like though. I mean sure every show is smart, funny in dark way, keeps you on your toes, but my question is when did TV become work.

Seriously all these super intelligent shows zap my energy all the time. My ego never lets me not get them and understanding and following them is work, which is not even satisfying all the time. I mean look at my blog heading, nothing smart funny there, my energy and wit has all been drained by the cable tv’s idiotic shows being intelligent.

Apart from the obvious IQ factor, these shows have absolutely no moral codes. Either its all about vanity a la nip tuck, root for a serial murderer sociopath dexter and now try to find hidden meaning with jingoistic hank doing anyone in sight on californication. Gone are the days of laughing at friends that seems like a kiddie show now.

I have decided to take a break from all this madness and meditate, actually I plan to go back to my original love, reading, started Life of Pi. Literature never seemed so clean, calming and without any hidden or in your face u know what innuendos..

Morbid Curiosity

I m seriously considering going to a shrink, for one thing it sounds kinda fancy, secondly all bigshots have shrinks, plus I wanna see the purported “couch” and I m developing some serious doubts about thyself.

Ok first of all (this first, second thing I m doing it a lot, reminds me of lettermen, lettermen weird name huh wonder if he got it in kindergarten, but then it should be letterboy, man do u see how my brain wanders). So no first, seconds, what I was saying in that previous haze was that I was never a weirdo as a kid, in-fact I m very squeamish almost hypochondriac kind of person (talk abt impersonal blogs). Never into dissecting animals, collecting bugs, ok I have killed lots of insects on the way but that was just for survival.

So what has started bothering me lately is my weird fascination with really morbid shows and movies. Again I m not a saw, hostel gore violence fan, but then again I did like Sweeney Todd. Have read some Stephen King, saw in the mouth of madness, the other day. Then I stumbled on dexter, I tried watching rome, and the tudors but I m not just a history person and I cannot care less for politics. Now Dexter is not very gripping, not all the time, but its smart really dark funny show and as I mentioned in the heading, I have this morbid curiosity. The whole dexter titles is provocative, the way they show person having breakfast is more like a controlled massacre, kinda like how it was in American psycho, seemed like blood drops but was actually fancy food.

How dexter keeps thinking in his head about how “normal” people behave. There is this part when they show people cracking open lobsters with hammers, and he thinks normal people are very violent. But then again, this show has received a lot of critical acclaim, so I just think I m into watching high quality shows and if you have not watched it yet maybe you should check it out.. As for the shrink part, I saw in treatment (on podcast while working out, I do get out of the house too) if its even remotely similar I guess I m bored of therapy already..